Getting Over Guide

Posted: July 19, 2010 in July
Tags: , ,

Just my thoughts on getting over someone. I may not be the most experienced in relationships of my own, but these steps usually have helped people that come crying to me.

1. Realize that it is over. This might take some time, but it is an essential part of the process.

2. One of the most important steps, know that it wasn’t your fault. A lot of people do this; they think back over the relationship and pin things on themselves that could have made the relationship end. Don’t do that. It only makes you feel worse and that’s not what you are trying to do. You need to just think that the person that left you gave up something amazing. A friend told me one time that I was better off alone because if they guy couldn’t realize what he had and left it was his fault. I don’t care if you were clingy or any of that. Don’t reanalyze yourself. Just move on from it.

3. Emotional Vomit. Yeah it sounds gross, but that’s what it is. You have to let your emotions over flow and they come in a lot of different ways. Cry, be angry, do whatever you must to get emotions out. Out of experience my favorite emotional vomit was anger just because I burned everything that could possibly bring on flashbacks. Notes, pictures, anything. Just be sure not to burn yourself because then you have another reminder.

4. Talk. It sounds like it’d be a simple thing to do, but sometimes it’s not. If you hold up some little emotion it turns into a big emotion eventually. Talk to someone about it. This also turns into emotion vomit, but more of word vomit. Don’t worry if your friend is really there for you it shouldn’t freak them out that you spill everything in one gush.

5. Remember why it ended. This might be a mutual separation or the person dumped you. Remember why. It may hurt for a while, but it lessens after a while. You may end up hating the person, but if it helps you get over it, then eventually you won’t hate them again.

6. Know that the pain never really goes away. This is only for people who have been in a relationship for over a year and if you’ve gotten very attached and close to the other party. If you think that they could have been the one or that you seriously love them, know that the ache never really ends. In cases like this it’s usually okay for you to continue hating the person. Just be sure to keep it to yourself and then it will just turn into a reason you don’t want to see that person.

7. Move on. One of the best ways to get over a person is to just move on and put yourself out there for something new to happen. Don’t try to get into a serious relationship right off, just go out and have some fun.

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