Posted: April 6, 2011 in April
Tags: , , , , ,

For some reason life just seems so much easier when you have no social life and you can just do whatever is necessary when you need to. But when does the easier part of life come in? The part where I am still just a kid and I want to have some time for freedom where I don’t have to worry about what’s going to happen next…

I got a call from my father tonight. It was angry and mean and demanding. At the end of it he yelled at me for having people around and how they were being loud. I am sorry but after living in dorms for the past nine months I know it’s pointless to ask people to be quiet. You get what you can when you can. I hate that he yelled at me like I could control what was happening around me. I hate that I really question at this point how friendly my friends really are to me. Sure it’s all fun and amazing when everyone’s enjoying themselves, but then things like this happen and they make noise on purpose it really makes me think.

I’ve thought about things a bit tonight. I’ve realized something. I used to have friends that I would tell everything to. Just someone to vent to, because I am usually the one that gets vented to, but I don’t have that anymore since I’ve come to college. I miss that…It just seems like no one really gets me here. I have close friends, but even then they don’t understand me and why I do the things I do.

We’re all mixed together from different parts of life and trying to act like we understand each other is pointless. I try to understand, but I know that I never can. And I wonder why I think people here are so odd sometimes.


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