I Wonder…

Am I the same person that you knew in the summer? It’s been a winter and a fall and I don’t know if I am still the person you loved during the summer. Or if you even loved me then. I don’t even know if you’re the same person from then…I miss the summer…

Randomly Ranting

Okay, I haven’t written a good lengthy post in well a while. All of my good long posts are intermixed with random quotes (mostly lyrics) and not really just me. So I think I’ll try and get everything out as a stress relief right now and see where it goes. I really don’t have any real direction for this in mind.

So, where to begin? I haven’t really written anything long and slightly random like this in a very long time. Usually when I do this I am half asleep, but I haven’t been a real insomniac in a while. I’ve actually been doing pretty okay on the sleeping front. Weird dreams here and there and some night I honestly just don’t want to sleep. But usually as soon as I lay down it doesn’t take me long to fall asleep anymore. I think that’s because I do so much walking around and other stuff here at college. The only place I actually drive to is Wal-Mart and I try not to go there too often.

I think my body is just too tired to even try to lose sleep over stress. Sure I have my present predicament with a certain guy. (In case you’re totally lost I like this guy and I can’t tell him that I do. He’s a good Mormon boy and he’s getting ready to go on a mission. He’s told me as a friend that he doesn’t want to be distracted by a girlfriend waiting at home for him. Honestly I think he’d make an amazing missionary even if he were distracted. He doesn’t know that I am honestly considering the thought of if we were together that I would probably wait for him if he asked me to. He doesn’t know because he doesn’t see me as being into him, which is partly my fault of being too chicken to tell him. I know what you’re thinking, when am I going to grow up and finally feel confident enough to tell a guy that I am into him? Probably not for a very long time. Every time I’ve tried it doesn’t end well. I always want guys I really can’t or shouldn’t have…) And now there’s the problem with my roommate’s persistent ex-boyfriend. He just broke up with his last girlfriend and is creeping around my dorm again…

This guy has had like 2 or 3 girlfriends since my roommate. One dumped him within a day. Why girls honestly want to date him I have no idea. I think he puts on a nice little show for them when they first meet. Make them think he’s a good little Mormon boy that just wants to get married when he meets the right girl. And oh maybe it’s you or you or you…Please girls really aren’t that stupid (I think). We talk and we do have eyes. “Wait wasn’t that guy with that girl last week?” Yeah he’s just such scum that he moves on to another innocent sap each week or so. Sadly my roommate was one of the saps. Maybe this time she’ll listen to her friends when we say, “Don’t do it!”.

It’s starting to get warm again here in Arizona. This is good and bad, all at the same time. The days are going to be so miserably hot that you won’t want to do anything but find shade or a breeze (or a sprinkler…), but once the sun starts to go down it gets just right. I love going out at around twilight during the warm months. I don’t say summer because seeing how I am in Arizona it’s usually warm here! I am a night person for sure! I love just going out and walking around campus here at my college when it’s like midnight and just looking up at the stars. That’s what I love about this town, it’s bigger than my hometown but since there is an observatory on the mountain the lights in the city have to be dim. It’s so great. 

This is just a cool picture I have from when I was in photography class. I think it’s so amazing that those are actually tail light from a car. Photography is just so amazing. In a blink of an eye you capture a moment in time for a forever memory. Art in general is the same, it’s just that painting or sculpting takes longer. I am in a ceramics class this semester and I love it. I took pottery in high school for two years and I missed it so much.

I think it’s funny that half way through this post I decided to put in random pictures. I just think posts with pictures are more exciting and more fun to read. I bet people scroll through posts just to see if there are pictures and if one catches their eye that’s the post the read. I know that’s how most people have to choice what they read. How do I know this? I do it too. 🙂 Honestly that’s what usually draws me in, a cool random picture that makes you wonder what this post could be about.

Well I think this little experiment worked rather well. Most of it was just random little thought that were mostly happy. I’ll have to try this again sometime.